Day 7: How long will it take?

I never told you..

It's been 6 long, dragging weeks since my heart was broken... AGAIN. I know I should be moving on, I know I should stop thinking about him, I know I should stop waiting... I know I should also stop pretending that I'm OKAY. I KNOW. But I know is different from I can.. I know I need to, but I can't. I've been trying to build my hopes up that one day this will all come to pass. This is just a phase. And people really do experience heartaches. Who doesn't? I've never met anyone who hasn't had his/her heart broken even for once. So, I know it's normal. I know this will come to pass. I know and I believe that God will help me through the process. 

How hard can it get when all of a sudden the person you thought would be the only person that you'll love, does not love you any more. How painful can it be when you're a thousand miles away from home and you can't do anything about it.... Honestly, I still feel the pain. Until now, I still feel it. It never left. It's just there. I just thank God for always giving me the strength and the comfort to stand and face every day, even if it's very difficult for me, I still try to move on. I want to move on. I want to let go. 

I still think about him.. I still think about us. I still think about the good times and the memories that we've left behind. We were inseparable, well that's what I thought. But if it's not meant to be, it will definitely end whether we like it or not. 

Wala talaga akong gana magsulat.. Hindi ko alam bakit. Tinamaan nanaman ako ng lungkot. Day 7. It's been a week since I've been writing. I wish this will all end. I pray that it ends as soon as possible. 

Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay. Lord help me.